James Barr: Sorry I Hurt Your Son (Said My Ex to My Mum)

What could I say? James took me on a rollercoaster of emotion. I did sign up for this, but I never expect it could be this kind of emphatically funny. I never knew that vulnerability and comedy could in the same hour. And it was unconventionally reflective, James took us, not to laugh to his story, but to heal with him through laughing, without being "pissed". It requires significant talent, and only James could do that. 5/5

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ Incredible. This show is hilarious, awkward, devastating, and most importantly healing. James manages to perfectly depict the inner battles someone goes through in the face of abuse, all while making the audience cackle with laughter at the same time. The balance of classic stand up with heart wrenching admissions is brave without ever being preachy. Every time an artist shares a piece like this, the world becomes a better place.

James’ method of blending his absolute likability, sharp insights, and the gravity of his experiences, is incredible. It made me feel that he deeply cares about our individual experience of sharing his every emotion.
My profession takes me to the heights of hearing stories identical to these everyday - the accolade deserving of James is that of openly acknowledging the past, present, and future of the behaviour he was victim to. In doing so, he is a Survivor. This is rarely heard, and I trust that he is paving the way for others.
If you’re reading this review with a mind to seeing James’ show, you MUST. A true icon, and walking out you will feel a sense of admiration, awakening, hilarity, sadness, and the query of ‘how do we make a difference?’.
There are not enough stars to rate this, but James certainly is one.

I have immense respect for the way James Barr tells his story on stage, and even for telling it at all. He handles everything expertly from compering at the top to the push-pull of tension emotion of the story to reliving that for the audience by adding humor. There were some truly hilarious moments.
I saw tears in the eyes of those around me and felt them in my own. There is an importance to this show, though there is no self-importance in the writing or performance.
I fully recommend this show and am a bit in awe of James. I'm also grateful that he made it through a very difficult time with such strength and carries the courage to talk about it on stage the way he does.

FIVE STARS ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ It takes an enormous amount of skill to balance outrageous humour with heartbreaking pathos and have the audience feel every bit of each. James Barr makes it seem effortless.

“Sorry I Hurt Your Son...” is a blisteringly frank show about abuse and trauma that never forgets that life is also frequently ridiculous. Rather than dumping his trauma on us and trying to make his audience feel bad, Barr recognises that his experiences are sadly not unique. He treats both us and the subject matter with enormous care and empathy - creating a real sense of community and shared catharsis. He’s also very, very funny.

This is the kind of Fringe show you will remember for many years to come. It’s vitally important but never self-important. Deeply personal but also universal. Heart-breaking but hopeful... and hilarious. You’ll never hear the Hokey Cokey the same way again. Highly recommended.

I have so much respect for James after seeing his show yesterday. A difficult subject matter both to tell and to hear but this came with a good balance of dark humour and making the audience feel at ease (as best as possible) as James took us through his journey.

Thank you for sharing your story and hopefully this supports and inspires other survivors.
Highly recommend.

Brilliant show dealing with a difficult subject that’s not discussed a lot (even in heterosexual relationships where men can also be the victims).
As a victim of domestic abuse it’s good to hear someone else’s stories as helps because for years I didn’t realise what I had properly went through (just thinking I had been treated like s**t). But now it’s helping me starting to talk to some people about it.
Thank you James and also your hug at the end of the show also helped.

I find it kind of difficult to review shows in general, but I struggle to put into words all that I felt at this show (and afterwards). I think I will keep thinking about it for a while...

A rollercoaster of a show, so funny and filled with humour, but also intense and uncomfortable, as it deals with a serious and important issue: abuse.

James' voice and story needs to be heard, and he does a fantastic job of taking the audience through his journey. Sincere and powerful. A must-see this year's Fringe.

10/10

This is an incredible show. It really takes you on a journey and is funny, heartbreaking, raw and stunningly delivered. A big thank you for making this and sharing yourself with the world

This is truly exceptional. James, as ever, is funny and endearing. There's a powerful and important message about domestic abuse, physical and psychological, too though. There are laughs aplenty, but this is also brave. This story matters. Don't miss it.

A really thought provoking show, well worth seeing.

A serious and difficult topic, but dealt with with humour, candour and honesty.

Thank you for sharing your experiences with such openness, James. Xx

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐


Refreshingly honest
A proper giggle
Provocative, necessary and first rate Fringe


The ease of a standup that knows the rules of the game. Involving the audience with witticisms about Northern Ireland, Eastbourne and the Guardian Podcast. You're laughing, before the show proper begins.

I'd not seen James perform before, or listened to his morning radio show, and I did not know what to expect. That didn't matter.

The warmth of interaction drew the audience in, and to share what happens next would spoil what was a really special hour at the Festival.

It's a tough subject matter, delivered with a freshing honesty and pathos. It's crafted. The use of pace is first class, constantly rocking us from belly laugh about a pretentious 6 year old to silence in response to the worst kind of kitchen sink drama.

At the end James shares that he hopes you laugh, you enjoyed the show and at times you did not know whether you could laugh, and perhaps you didn't want to laugh.

Yes.

Highly Recommended.

Very daring, clever and in-yer-face performance. James Barr bares himself, not only about domestic abuse, but about his intimate life as a gay man. Stunning.

I saw this on Saturday afternoon. It was one of the most genuinely moving pieces of standup I have seen for years at the fringe.
Although the main theme is abuse by a partner, it contains a lot of very original humour and he comes across as a very genuine human being - and a gloriously unapologetic sex-positive gay man.
I would certainly recommend it to anyone looking for a refreshing, but challenging, change from the usual standup routines that tend to dominate the fringe.